NoFucksGiving™: 6.9
It Was Better Before You Came***
*** There is no party. Nothing is happening. ***
2027: emPYRE
May 14–16, 2027
Egyptian Ranchos, Black Rock Desert, NV
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We are already SOLD OUT FOR 2027. You will likely need to bring a battering ram, trebuchet, Panzer, or armored dreadnought to gain entrance.
Location & Directions
Please view the map for specific location and camping directions.
BLACK ROCK
DESERT
DESERT
● Gerlach
NOT TO SCALEWhat to Expect
>>> READ THE FUCKING WEBSITE <<<
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IF YOU CAN READ THIS, YOUR BROWSER IS TOO FUCKING NEW // NETSCAPE 4.0 // 800x600
*** NO REFUNDS *** NO FUCKING SCHEDULE *** STOP EMAILING US *** BRING YOUR OWN SHIT *** UNDER CONSTRUCTION SINCE 1998 ***
⚠️ READ THIS, ASSHOLE ⚠️
JUST KIDDING, THERE'S NOTHING WORTH READING HERE ANYWAYS.
JUST KIDDING, THERE'S NOTHING WORTH READING HERE ANYWAYS.
*** STUPID QUESTIONS / UNHELPFUL ANSWERS ***
| QUESTION | OFFICIAL RESPONSE |
|---|---|
| Will there be infrastructure? | No. Bring some. |
| Is there a schedule? | Fuck around and find out. |
| What should I bring? | Wyndham Rewards card. |
| Will there be dancing? | WE'VE LOST DANCING. 🕺 🕺 🕺 |
| What is the dress code? | emPYRE. Who are you aligned with? Who's gotten to you?? |
| Is there cell service? | Eat a bag of dicks. |
| Are there bathrooms? | A few usually fall out of the sky. Figure it the fuck out, or take a shit in Steven's trailer. |
| What about the weather? | Burn shit to stay warm or die. |
| Can I bring friends? | SOLD OUT. |
| What happens at night? | The battle begins. |
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THIS IS FINE. FUCK OFF.emPYRE 2027👶 💀 👽 🦄 🤡 🍼 👹 🪦 👶
DEAD BABIESEst. 1997>>> IMPORTANT DESERT SURVIVAL INFORMATION <<<
- There is dust. A lot of fucking dust.
- It can be hot, cold, windy, or all three. Prepare accordingly.
- There are no staff, services, or fucking concierges.
- Bring what you need. Take all your shit home.
- Leave No Trace. This one is actually serious.
🚧 UNDER CONSTRUCTION 🚧
YOUR COMPLAINT HAS BEEN DELETED SUCCESSFULLYYou are visitor number 69© 1998–2027 NOFUCKSGIVING INTERNET SERVICES.
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Contact
For questions or clarifications, ask an AI bot like everyone else you lazy fuck.
Legal
This website does not constitute an invitation. No tickets are available. Nothing here should be construed as a promise of anything.
***cum
👽 Thank you for not cumming. 👽